Posted in 2020, kathy70, Quarantine, Travel, Uncategorized, Writing, Yes

is racism now a pissing contest

how did you get here?  how did i get here?  can we be here together?  are we better together?  can we ignore our past? will we ever move forward?  does my like have to become your hate? how can i stop hurting?  is there a way i can help? do you want my help? i want to apologize.  will you ever accept me?  how do we show we are different?  can i just get a good night of sleep?

This is a small corner of my brain right now.  I am not sure I will ever recover from this trauma playing out in the world, I am not sure I should recover or can.  The killer illness was a drop in the bucket of our own manufactured disease.  Thankfully the curtain has been pulled back and some of us are really looking at ourselves.  What the heck is she talking about???

My fervent hope is that we never stop talking about the current events in the world and our part in this.  Sunday Morning had an interview with the grandson of Teddy Roosevelt and he said yes that statue of my grandfather should come down.  Should we cry out over a flawed history that has been spoon fed to all.  I worked with a woman who told me in her high school if you put down on a test that the South lost the war you failed that class.  Should this be allowed to survive or shoved behind the curtain again or ripped out by the roots and tossed on the rubbish heap.  Never. But. Yes.   Can we talk about this, show the flaws, let each voice be heard but not louder than any other.  True explanations not whispers help us.  We must admit that if we have not been on the receiving end, we must have been on the giving end.

This has been a learning time for me, a time of loss, a time of exploration, a time to reprogram my brain.  Like everyone else.  I need to stop the noise in my head, I can’t wait to spend time with people outside my tiny sphere, I am craving travel to new places.  I would love to never hear about how slavery is no longer so let’s just get over it or my families slavery was worse than your families.  My poverty is poorer than your poverty.  One thing that can’t ever be erased is that most forms of racism are based on an external thing that gives no indication of the person inside.  Yes, sometimes it’s not that blatant, but more than any other type it is blatant.  All I have to do is look at your skin or your eyes or your hair or clothing or address or church and my opinion is already formed.  Now is the time for my primal yell to the heavens. Let’s make this stop.  It is time to cut off the head of this monster.

 

5 thoughts on “is racism now a pissing contest

  1. Sorry, I hit a wrong button and had not finished my response to Ruth. Today it is a battleground that needs people like you and I to be brave and not shy away from speaking our truth. Glad to have you as a friend and hope we can get together sometime next year.

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  2. Totally agree with what you’re feeling. I also saw the Roosevelt grandson yesterday and wish everyone could see it and hear his thoughts. Having been born and raised here in the South, and having grown up with my father’s family extremely prejudiced, I have seen some of the racial problems blacks have been through. Fortunately, my mother did not allow any racial sentiments around me, but I was not completely shielded. I had my first black friends when I went to college and have had many dear friends of color since. I must admit that I have been like most of the Baby Boomers. I was enthusiastic about the protests of the 60s and gung-ho to help, but when MLK was assassinated, it kind of took the wind out of my sails and I fell into my own life and my own problems. When I watched “13th” last month, I realized how I had been pulled along by those in power and had not been aware of what was going on and more importantly, why. I realize now that I need to be antiracist rather than just “not a racist.” Only took 50 years to get to this point! I could go on and on, but I won’t!!!

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    1. Thanks Ruth for your insightful comments. At our age, it is sometimes very hard to look at ourselves and I am delighted to be doing some of the same things. I never want this change to pull back but expand. One of the good things my mom did was to not share any of her prejudices with us. I have had that same talk with my children and they said that yes, I was very good and did not allow and hint of prejudice to enter our home. The sad part is that they learned some bad habits from friends, neighbors or

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